Worthlessness

I finally got it! For about a month now, I’ve been trying to track down a pattern I see in me constantly. For instance, why do I feel so self-conscious all the time, like someone is going to catch me when I’m out around people? Why do I let people walk all over me? Why am I constantly holding myself back from things that I want? Why am I willing to stay in relationships for way too long to save the other’s feelings even if I’m unhappy?

Well, let me tell you why. I firmly believe that I am worthless. Not deserving of so many things in life, and not capable of succeeding.

So that’s my first big thing to unwind. I know well enough to continue to work around the edges of that, so I will, and at the same time, cultivate patience.

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